


Unexpected Comfort

by EnchantHollow



Category: Arsenic and Old Lace (1944), Arsenic and Old Lace Theatrical Version
Genre: And I highlighted Mortimer being a dick, F/M, I turned Jonathan into a sympathetic character, Infidelity, M/M, Some violence (it is Arsenic and Old Lace), There has to be a reason Jonathan is the way he is, This is based on the play rather than the movie, mentions of child abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:54:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24543406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnchantHollow/pseuds/EnchantHollow
Summary: Jonathan Brewster has come home after many years, and he's reminded of his unpleasant past in this house.  Now he's got the pretty girl next door to deal with as well, while Elaine is faced with the fact that Mortimer might not be who she thought he was.  Everyone is hiding something, and as secrets come to light, alliances shift and people get hurt.
Relationships: Jonathan Brewster/Elaine Harper, Mortimer Brewster/Al
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to my Arsenic and Old Lace fanfiction (for the play). First of all, a little background. I directed a production of Arsenic and Old Lace at one point, and I spent a lot of time thinking about his motivations, creating rather ridiculous but fun headcanons, and deciding what relationships made sense. In the end, I decided that Einstein was in love with Jonathan, Jonathan had a massive crush on Elaine, and Mortimer was cheating on Elaine with Al (Mortimer’s co-worker on the telephone.) This was the result. This is definitely AU, I suppose, although up to the point where it begins, everything technically fits in with cannon. You’ll get the idea as we go.
> 
> Large portions of this first chapter contain dialogue directly from the show.

Elaine let out a sigh as she started trudging back over to Mortimer’s house. Her father was always worrying and praying over her; if only he knew what she had been getting up to in his precious church for years, maybe he would realize that it was far too late. She was frustrated now; Mortimer would no doubt be put out with her for being late, and now her father would be watching her even more closely. As she passed the last few headstones on her shortcut, she spotted an unfamiliar car pulling up to the sidewalk. ‘That’s odd. Abby and Martha don’t get visitors often, at least not ones who drive; the neighbors and the friendly policemen are usually the only ones who come by, and they walk.’

Curiosity had always been one of her worst vices, at least according to her father, and now was no exception as she slunk closer to the car, trying to keep to the shadows. As the driver’s side door opened, she slid smoothly into the shadow of the house, waiting to see more. The man who exited the car moved with confidence, she noted, but she couldn’t see his face under his black bowler, and his dark suit made him seem to fade in the evening light.

“Come _on_! We’ve got work to do!” The man growled in a low, irritated voice. It frightened her a little; the men she was usually around weren’t so angry or demanding, but she was never one to shrink away from anything, so she straightened up. Another man exited the car, this one shorter and less assertive looking, wearing a hideous patterned jacket and a grey newsboy cap. He walked almost hunched over, and he couldn’t seem to manage a straight line; he swayed and swerved, nearly tumbling off the sidewalk. The first man grumbled under his breath before storming over the second and grabbing his lapel. It was then that she chose to make her move.

“Excuse me; are you friends of Abby and Martha?” She stayed in the shadows, but her tone was polite and non-accusatory. The tall man jerked up in surprise and searched the shadows, trying to spot her. It vexed her to no end that she still couldn’t see his face.

“Who’s there?” His voice was still sharp, but it had lost that dangerous and scary undertone. She smirked slightly as she opted to remain mysterious.

“No one important,” she replied, sinking further into the dark and using her basic ventriloquism skills, learned to make Mortimer smile, to throw her voice across the road. The talent had failed to entertain Mortimer (he said that it was just another useless theatre ability that no sensible person would want), but it worked for her now. The shorter man spun trying to keep track of it and fell hard. The other was still looking around suspiciously, but he didn’t seem angry. A clearing of his throat filled the silence for a moment, and then he seemed to adopt a slightly more polite attitude.

“We,” he gestured to himself and the man on the ground, “are here to see the Brewsters.” He yanked his friend up, but the man grabbed his shoulder and whispered something in his ear. He stiffened for a moment before pulling the shorter man the rest of the way to his feet.

“We have to go now, miss.” ‘Ah, so he did notice that I’m a woman. My voice probably gave me away.’ “We’ll be back later; thank you for your time.” He sounded oddly nervous, and his movements were rather jerky as he hurried back to the car and lunged inside. Before she could think of a response, the car had screeched away, and she was left to head back into the Brewster home to meet Mortimer. The encounter was odd, but after a moment, she decided to put the mysterious man from her mind and focus on her wonderful fiancé.

OooOooOooOooO (Later that Evening)

There was a car at the curb again when she looked out her window with tear-filled eyes. Wondering what had made Mortimer so cold had done no good, and she could only be glad that her father had not seen her re-enter the house hours before she was expected. ‘He already disapproves of Mort; he would jump on a chance to forbid me from seeing him. But now I wonder if he would be wrong.’ She heaved a sigh and refocused on the problem at hand. ‘Who could that be?’ In her despair, she had forgotten all about the men from earlier, and it was understandable that she was suspicious.

A shadow moved around the car, opening one of the doors, and she leapt off her bed, left the room, and headed down the stairs. ‘I have to warn Miss Abby and Miss Martha! It could be a sneak-thief or even a murderer! They must call the police!’ By the time she made it out the door, there was no one there, but she had never doubted her eyes before, and now was not the time to start.

‘It’s a good thing they never lock their doors,’ she pondered as she entered the darkened foyer. “Miss Abby, Miss Martha?” She called. It was far too dark to see anything, but she could hear just fine, and she was pretty sure there was someone in the room as she called again. Then the door slammed behind her, followed by footsteps, and she was positive. Panic was her immediate reaction, but she tried to quell it besides the gasp that had already escaped. ‘Maybe it’s just Teddy; he’s wandered around at this hour before.’

“Who is it? Is that you, Teddy?” Despite her good intentions, her voice still came out rather frightened. A shape moved closer to her in the shadows, and her composure slipped still further as she tripped backwards into a chair. ‘When did I reach the table?’ “Who _are_ you?”

A vaguely recognizable but hard to place voice answered her, far more threateningly than she would have liked. “Who are _you_?” Unbidden, a shudder of fear raced down her spine, chilling her through her thin dress. She quickly decided that it would probably be best to be honest.

“I’m Elaine Harper – I live next door.” ‘Why did you tell him where you live?! What if he follows you home? What if you don’t even make it home at all?!’ Now she was nearing full panic, and all her senses were screaming at her to get out of there as fast as possible.

“Then what are you doing here?” The voice was demanding, unforgiving, and somewhat familiar. It was, at the very back of her mind, bothering her, but she didn’t have time to try to reason it out.

“I came over to see Miss Abby and Miss Martha,” she answered weakly. ‘Probably not best to tell him that you wanted them to call the cops on him. Why didn’t I just call them from home?!’ She still couldn’t see the man in the dark, but she was fairly sure she had heard another set of footsteps, a truth that was verified with the man’s next statement.

“Turn on the lights, Doctor.” The brightness was nearly blinding for a moment, but Elaine was instantly searching for the other occupant of the room, trying to identify the threat. It was far worse than she had expected. The man was deathly pale with long, thin scars running across his face in several places. His eyes were dark and purposeful, though she couldn’t help but note that they were a warm chocolate color, similar to Mortimer’s but a little more auburn. And his black bowler seemed oddly familiar. Still, the scars and the grimly frowning mouth were more than a little distracting as he took a menacing step forward.

“You chose rather an untimely moment for a social call.” ‘Isn’t that the truth,’ she thought with a mental sigh at her blatant stupidity. ‘Well, it’s too late now; I better not let him see that I’m scared.’

“I think you’d better explain what _you’re_ doing here.” The man was practically ignoring her, and she felt the first stirrings of anger; she had been ignored quite enough for one night. Her gaze strayed briefly to the other man in the room; his jacket once again tugged at her memory, but she had no time to consider it. She turned her attention back to the tall man in the black suit.

“We happen to live here.” Now he was lying, and she _hated_ liars.

“You _don’t_ live here! I’m in this house every day, and I’ve never seen you before!” Then she blanched as she realized that snarling and practically shouting at a potential murderer was not a good idea, and her fears came rushing back, along with concern for her fiancé’s family. “Where are Miss Abby and Miss Martha? What have you done to them?” The man seemed to shed his angry demeanor, at least a little, and took a small step back from her.

“Perhaps we’d better introduce ourselves. This is Dr. Einstein.” He gestured to the short man in the hideous grey coat, but her eyes only skated over him before returning to the real threat.

“Dr. Einstein?” Her mind flashed to a man in a lab coat with crazy hair, and she quickly decided that she was being lied to again, bringing back the heat of her righteous fury to melt the ice in her spine. She usually tried to avoid being hurtful, but her emotions were already a mess, and she couldn’t take it anymore, so she said the rudest thing that came to mind. “And I suppose you’re going to tell me you’re Boris Kar-”

“I’m Jonathan Brewster,” the man growled as he cut her off. Her thoughts went in several directions at once, but all in a split second. ‘So that’s why his eyes are like Mortimer’s.’ ‘Where have I heard that name before?’ ‘Is that why he’s here?’ ‘Oh, right, Mort was telling me earlier. He didn’t seem like a very nice guy.’ ‘Does Mort know he’s here?’

She took an involuntary step backward. “Oh – you’re Jonathan!” It snapped into place suddenly. ‘The man in black from earlier! Of course!’ She then registered that he was talking.

“–heard of me.” She didn’t catch the beginning, but what she got was enough to infer what he had said, and she chose her words carefully.

“Yes – just this afternoon for the first time.” ‘Probably best not to say more.’

“And what did they say about me?” ‘Hell. Is he getting closer? Damn; he’s definitely getting closer!’ Panic set in again, and she couldn’t reason it away this time. ‘Keep it simple’

“Only that there was another brother named Jonathan – that’s all that was said. Well, that explains everything. Now that I know who you are-” she sprinted to the door and yanked, but it appeared that he had locked it when he had come in, and now she had no escape route. ‘Keep breathing.’ “If you’ll kindly unlock the door.”

He came up behind her, and she spun to face him without even thinking about it. Before she realized it, he was in her personal space, pressing her to the door, unlocking it, and opening it a crack before slamming it shut again. She heard the click of the lock and forced down a whimper. Then his hand slammed into the door next to her head, and she couldn’t withhold it. He stared down at her, his brown eyes practically glowing, and she found herself oddly breathless. ‘It’s probably adrenaline,’ she decided in the rear of her brain. She refused to think about why that felt like a lie.

“’That explains everything’? Just what did you mean by that? Why did you come here this time of night?” ‘Hell! Why couldn’t I have kept my big mouth shut?! Or better yet, why didn’t I call the police from home and not come over here at all? Did I really think I could handle an intruder by myself? Stupid, stupid, stupid!’ After a moment, she resolved to tell the truth and hope for the best.

“I thought I saw someone prowling around the house. I suppose it was you.” If possible, he got even closer, breathing on her face. For some stupid reason, she noticed that his breath was minty.

“You thought you saw someone prowling around the house?” ‘What did I just say, genius?’ The sarcasm was there in her mind, but the fear was overwhelming, and she wasn’t even trying to hide it anymore.

“Yes – weren’t you just outside? Isn’t that your car?” She used the pointing out the window as an excuse to dart around Jonathan and escape back into the room. Unfortunately, though not unexpectedly, he followed her, still stalking around menacingly and trying to get into her space.

“You saw someone at the car?” ‘Is he deaf or something?’ ‘Simple answers. Don’t make him angry.’

“Yes.” The quiver in her voice was getting worse, but she couldn’t suppress it, and her energy was better spent keeping out of his reach.

“What else did you see?” She stumbled a bit and continued her retreat.

“Just someone walking around the house to the car.”

“What else did you see?”

“Just that – that’s all. That’s why I came over here. I wanted to tell Miss Abby to call the police.” ‘Why would you tell him _that?!_ Do you _want_ him to kill you?!’ “But if it was you, and that’s your car, I don’t need to bother Miss Abby. I’ll be running along.” She made for the door, even though she knew it was locked, but this time he slid in front of her and prevented her escape. She was running out of space to back up, and she dreaded to think what would happen when she reached the wall.

“What was the man doing at the car?” ‘What _were_ you doing that you’re so concerned that I saw it?’

“I don’t _know_! You see, I was on my way over here.” ‘And I’m a little glad I was; whatever you were doing is probably not something I wanted to see anyway.’

Suddenly, he changed directions, forcing her back across the room toward the door. “I think you’re lying.” She heard Einstein moving behind her and hoped that he wasn’t blocking her escape. He spoke up for the first time that night.

“I think she tells the truth, Chonny. We let her go now, huh?” ‘His German accent is about as fake as that imitation flour Miss Abby’s always on about, and he has no fashion sense, but he’s speaking in my defense, so I suppose I can let that go.’ Unfortunately, ‘Chonny’ was not to be deterred.

“I think she’s lying. Breaking into a house this time of night. I think she’s dangerous. She shouldn’t be allowed around loose.” She had only a fraction of a second to ponder the irony of _him_ calling _her_ dangerous before he had seized her arm roughly. His hands were strangely warm for one so pale, but she had exactly no time to consider it as she tried to wrench away and let out a shriek.

“Take your hands off me-”

“Doctor-” He cut her off yet again, but no one would ever know what he wanted Einstein to do, because at that moment, everything froze as Teddy came trotting out of the cellar, unperturbed by the scene that met him. Elaine saw a chance for escape and leapt for it, pulling a rather surprised Jonathan behind her.

“Teddy! Teddy! Tell these men who I am!” In retrospect, that wasn’t the best choice of plea. ‘I should have just told him that they were assaulting me and that he needed to go for help.’ She was proven right as he kept walking without a care for her safety. To be fair, he probably hadn’t noticed.

“That’s my daughter – Alice.” His customary shout of “Charge!” was practically drowned out by her calling after him as she wrenched Jonathan around once more, and he twisted her arm behind her back.

“No! No! Teddy!” At last, Jonathan got a hand clamped over her mouth, and her cries were muffled.

“Doctor! Your handkerchief!” As soon as his hand left her mouth, she let out another piercing scream, but it did no good. Jonathan clapped the handkerchief over her mouth, calling to Einstein to open the cellar, and she couldn’t help grimacing at the thought that the handkerchief was probably used. Jonathan’s arm was now around her waist, just under her breasts, and he dragged her backwards with clearly grim intentions. Somehow, in all the chaos, she still managed to observe that his arm was as warm as his hand, and in different circumstances, it would have been nice. ‘Mortimer never holds me like this. Wait; what am I thinking?! This man is about to murder me!’ As she looked into the light of the foyer for what was probably the last time, she wondered where her damned fiancé was when she needed him most.

As soon as Jonathan reached the cellar door, he threw her inside with Einstein and raced back out; she heard the most welcome sounds of Abby and Martha descending the stairs before the door slammed shut.

Einstein did not seem keen on restraining her, and he wasn’t nearly as strong as his counterpart; the moment she heard Mortimer enter the room, she jerked free and ran into her love’s arms, crying his name. ‘Why doesn’t his embrace feel as safe as it used to?’

OooOooOooOooO

The next few minutes were something of a blur for her. She remembered Mortimer practically dropping her from his embrace and Abby and Martha settling her on the couch. She remembered some panic and shaking after that, but not much else. It wasn’t until Jonathan left the room that she felt able to get up, and she quickly flung herself back into her fiancé’s arms. Yet again, they didn’t feel quite right, and she wasn’t very fond of his reaction to her. He was looking down on her again and making light of her pain. ‘What’s the matter with me? What’s the matter with _you?!’_

Before she knew it, she was settled on the couch with him, but he still didn’t seem to care much for her hysteria, and he was soon leaping away, shouting a non-sequitur. Then he had the audacity to try to send her home! ‘What is _wrong_ with you tonight?! This is not the man I fell in love with!’ When she demanded answers, he continued to be evasive; when she finally got to the bottom of things, there were still no solid reasons for his behavior. ‘Maybe he realized that he didn’t want to marry me, and this is his way of getting out of it.’ The thought stung, but it wasn’t nearly so bad as the pain of his conduct that evening.

She tried one last time to bring back the man she loved, but he kissed her with no qualms and sent her on her way, in tears and furious, for the second time that evening. On the bright side, she was too angry to be afraid anymore.

OooOooOooOooO (Upstairs)

Jonathan hurried up the stairs after Einstein after a parting shot at his brother. ‘That snot-nosed critic is gonna pay, thinking he can intimidate me. Call me a nightmare, will you? You’ll see just what a nightmare I am!’ By now, he had reached the doorway, and he looked inside to see Einstein gathering up their things and throwing them, rather haphazardly, into the suitcases.

“Stop, stop, stop! You’re doing everything wrong! First of all, you have to separate our clothes; the last thing I want is to smell like your alcoholism!” He was being gruff as usual, but it was just to cover up the panic near the surface. Cleanliness was extremely important, almost obsessively so, especially now that he was back in this house. An echo of reminiscence brushed past him. ‘Now, Jonathan, this is far too messy. Clean it, again. No dinner until it’s spotless. Mortimer, come on. Let’s go get you and Teddy some cake.’

As he fought back the tide of the past, he stormed over to Einstein and began helping him pack, carefully folding each item and settling it gently in its proper place.

“Now, where the hell did you put Spenalzo?”

Einstein haltingly explained, sounding and looking terrified. His hands were shaking badly enough that Jonathan quickly snatched the shirt he was wrinkling and folded it himself.

“You idiot! Why would you put him _there_?! How are we supposed to get him to the cellar without my interfering brother noticing now?!” If they had been alone, this would have been a roar, but he restrained himself to a furious whisper under the circumstances. His aunts had always been very strict about the noise level, at least with regards to him. ‘Jonathan, keep it down in there! The boys are playing cards with Martha and I, and you’re being terribly distracting. If you weren’t such a naughty boy, you’d be allowed to play with us, you know.’ Then there was the childish laughter of a favorite child lording it over his sibling. That alone was enough to have him clenching his teeth, but he forced the rage down under the surface, where it continued to simmer. Einstein’s irritating voice brought him back to the present.

“Well, that girl came in, and I didn’t want her to see him. Besides, he’s too heavy for me; I told you!” ‘Why must he always whine?’ “So I chust dropped him in der and closed it so she wouldn’t see.”

‘So it’s that woman’s fault,’ he considered. ‘That’s another thing to add to her account.’ His mind was drawn to the memories of that encounter. ‘She wasn’t as terrified as she should have been. Every other woman I’ve met in the last ten years has run screaming at the sight of me, but until I grabbed her, she didn’t even seem that scared. Odd. I wonder who she is.’

“Chonny?” Einstein snapped in his face, and he realized that he had been lost in his thoughts again. Still, it took a lot of willpower not to grab the offending hand and snap a few fingers himself. ‘He’s operating on you tomorrow; he needs his hands.’

“What? I was thinking.”

“Chonny, we’re not gonna kill that girl, right? She seemed like a nice lady. Besides, you don’t kill women. Please, Chonny, just leave her alone.” Jonathan growled under his breath before huffing quietly. ‘I don’t kill women because women don’t usually get within reach. But how much of a monster do you think I am?’

“No, I’m not going to kill her, you insufferable worm. I didn’t want to kill her in the first place; I was just planning on scaring her into keeping her mouth shut,” he replied irritably. His mind flashed to his arm around her waist, his skin brushing the undersides of her breasts through her shirt, and he shook his head to clear it. ‘What the hell was that?’ ‘Keep her mouth shut. That pretty red mouth with its soft lips.’ ‘Wait, what?!’ He shook his head again, harder this time. Einstein looked at him, obviously somewhat concerned by his sudden twitching.

“Ya know, Chonny, she seemed kinda familiar. Have we met her before?” About to wave him off, Jonathan took a moment to think and realized that his inebriated companion was right. ‘I have definitely heard that voice of hers before. Where?’ Then it came to him like a scalpel to the face, and he jumped with the revelation.

“This afternoon! She was the woman outside the house, the one who was throwing her voice! The one we couldn’t seem to spot! I completely forgot after that whole mess with Spenalzo, but it was her!”

“Oh, right, Chonny. I remember now. Dat was weird, huh? Wonder where she learned it,” Einstein rambled good-naturedly.

“Probably from my fool of a brother.” Oh, the irony.

“I’d better go talk to him before he thinks he’s got the upper hand. You stay here.” He headed down the stairs, ready to intimidate his brother. In fact, for some reason, he was more eager than usual, and the image of that woman was fresh in his mind.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s where it goes AU, ladies and gentlemen. To give you a sense of the time frame, O’Hara has come and gone, and Mortimer returned from ditching him. He left again to go get the papers signed, and the boys began their burial duty. However, after Mort returned, Abby and Martha went to bed instead of going to talk to Jonathan, and the dig job took a bit longer, meaning that he and Einstein are still in the cellar, Mortimer is upstairs, and Abby and Martha are asleep. Therefore, the foyer is empty and dark at the moment. Good? Good.

OooOooOooOooO (Later Still)

Elaine sat on her bed, thinking hard about the events of the evening. The house had been a beacon of activity for a while, with a cop going in and out and Mortimer coming and going, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. For the most part, her mind was on her fiancé, but occasionally, without her permission, her mind strayed to that crazed man, Jonathan. Little things, things that she shouldn’t have noticed, like how he didn’t smell like blood and death, but a musky, masculine scent that Mortimer could never have pulled off. And that was another thing! For whatever reason, she kept comparing him to Mort, and even worse, Mort usually came up lacking! ‘How is his violent, psychotic brother better than him? He tried to kill me! Nice eyes, clean teeth, good cologne, and comforting arms aren’t enough to make up for insanity and murderous intent! What am I thinking?!’

Even when she forcibly drove her thoughts back to Mortimer, it was no picnic. The more she pondered over it, the more it seemed that Mort had been hiding something important. ‘Isn’t marriage supposed to be a partnership? Doesn’t that mean that he should be willing to share with me? That he should trust me? What is so bad that he can’t tell me? And why was he so dismissive of me and my pain? Doesn’t my fear mean anything to him?’ She couldn’t help noticing that with regards to Mortimer, she had far more questions than answers, and it angered her. ‘Seems like I’ve been angry with Mort a lot tonight.’

Her father had gone to bed hours ago, and he didn’t even know she was home. Part of her wanted to go to him for comfort in this troubling time, but she was still irritated with him, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to tell him about really any of the events of the night. ‘Answers. I need answers to feel better. Some type of closure.’ With a small sigh, she stood, wiped the tears from her cheeks, and hurried down the stairs. ‘And if he tries to kick me out again, I’ll kick him right back. Somewhere painful.’

Not that she noticed, but Jonathan wasn’t even on her mind as a danger.

‘Still not smart enough to lock the door,’ she reflected with a wry shake of her head as she entered the house. “Mort? Mortimer, I need to talk to you!” ‘Okay, maybe that came out a little harsher and shout-ier than I meant it to. Oops.’ No one answered, and the foyer was mostly dark, so she decided to settle on the couch for a little while and wait. ‘No point in intruding on Abby and Martha; after all, maybe he went out again, and I’m not mad at them. If he doesn’t come down in the next few minutes, I’ll figure something out.’

She wasn’t sure how long she sat, but she began to drift in and out of consciousness, never fully aware, until she was shocked into wakefulness by the ringing of the phone. At first, she was apprehensive; after all, it wasn’t her house, but after three rings, not wanting the noise to wake Abby and Martha, she picked up the receiver. Unfortunately, there was also a phone upstairs, and Mortimer got there first.

His voice was hushed, which she found odd. He always shouted into the phone as if he thought that his voice had to physically cover the distance between him and the person on the other end.

“Al, is that you?” ‘Why is he getting calls from Al at 2:00 a.m.?’

“Yeah, it’s me. Man, it’s great to hear your voice, Mort. I missed you.” ‘”Mort?” I thought only I called him that! And how could you miss him; you were talking to him a few hours ago!’

“I know what you mean, but I’ve been busy.  _ She’s _ been around all evening, and I couldn’t get her to leave. God, she actually talked me into proposing to her just to get her to shut up; can you believe it?”  _ ‘What?! _ ’ She forced herself to breathe normally so as not to be noticed, but it took significant effort.

“What are you going to do? We won’t be able to keep this up once you get married, and I can’t lose you.” ‘Keep what up?’ Her heart was dropping further and further with each word, and she had a sinking suspicion of what was going on. ‘Please, please,  _ please _ let me be wrong!’

“Well, I told her we had to wait and see what was in rehearsal; I can always say I’ve got a show to review and come see you; that’s what I usually do. And we’ll put it off as long as possible; maybe by the time she strong-arms me into setting a date, we’ll have worked out a plan.”

“Alright. Are we still on for tomorrow? I’ve really been looking forward to trying that Italian place, and candlelit dinners are so romantic.” His voice sounded dreamy, and under other circumstances, it would have been sweet, but now she was choking back silent tears.

“Yeah, we’re on. I’ll see you then, darling.” She couldn’t keep it in anymore; fury and anguish were warring for dominance in her head and heart.

_ “What?! _ ” She was rewarded with two shocked gasps.

“ _ Elaine?! _ ” Mortimer didn’t even have the decency to sound guilty; he just sounded surprised and uncomfortable, like a little kid caught sneaking a cookie.

“You cheating  _ bastard _ !” She screeched. As soon as the handset was slammed down, she burst into tears. “How  _ could _ he?” She gasped to herself in between whimpers. Her misery was so all-consuming that she didn’t hear the footsteps on the basement stairs, and she didn’t even hear the creak of the cellar door opening.

She did, however, hear the exclamation of “What the hell?!” It was enough to draw her face up from its position in her hands. From behind a curtain of hair, she saw Jonathan standing in the doorway, staring at her in confusion. This distraction was only momentary, though, and she quickly dissolved into heart-wrenching sobs.

Her head was back in her hands, and she was practically dead to the world in her grief, so she did not notice his approach until a large, warm hand settled awkwardly on her shoulder. His semi-familiar scent enveloped her, and her sobs eased a little. Suddenly, she wanted to spill her heart out to this man she barely knew, a man who had tried to attack her only a few hours ago.

Like lancing a boil, all of the poison spilled from her heart and into the air. “How could he  _ do _ that to me?! Not only was he talking about me behind my back and complaining about me to his friends, but he was  _ cheating _ on me! And not even with another woman! He was cheating on me with his  _ male _ coworker! How could he do that?! Not that there’s anything wrong with men being together, but he was  _ cheating on me _ !” Jonathan, still standing awkwardly with his hand on her shoulder and an uncertain air about him, clumsily settled on the couch beside her and wrapped a tense arm around her shoulders. It was clear as day that he was uncomfortable and inexperienced with women, but he was trying, and that was more than enough.

Jonathan suddenly found himself with an armful of crying woman against his chest. Or a lapful, rather. And no idea what to do about it.

OooOooOooOooO (Slightly Earlier, in the Cellar)

“Would you hurry up and get that grave covered? The last thing we want is brother dear coming back with a cop and finding us finishing up!” Jonathan was nervous, far more so than he had been in a long time. Taking the rap for all thirteen of the bodies in the cellar was  _ not _ his idea of fun, even if it would sort of up his score, and he just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. Everything had gone quiet upstairs about half an hour ago, but he wasn’t sure how long it would last.

As if his thoughts had summoned bad luck, the phone rang upstairs. Three rings later, it was picked up, meaning that someone was awake. He motioned to Einstein to finish up as fast as possible and snuck halfway up the stairs to try to listen.

‘Whoever it is, they’re not downstairs. Probably my idiot brother; he would get calls at 2 a.m. and disturb the whole household. Lord knows that if I did that, I would have been locked in the closet all day and sent to bed with no dinner. And they probably would have set me to repairing doilies and clothes the next day, to boot. And Mortimer wonders why he got those needles under his fingernails; how can one boy create that many holes in the knees of all his trousers?! I swear he did it on purpose; Teddy wasn’t nearly so lazy and his clothes were always in good shape.’

He was pulled from his thoughts by a noise from the foyer. “ _ What?! _ ”

This was followed by a shriek of something nearly incomprehensible in a familiar voice, so he ran the last few steps and threw open the cellar door. His eyes quickly found the source of the disturbance; there was a crying woman half collapsed on the couch.

“What the hell?!” As the words left his mouth, he winced. ‘Probably not the most tactful thing I could have said. And isn’t that the woman from earlier? What was her name? Elaine; that’s it! What is she doing her late at night, again? Didn’t she learn from the last time?!’

His feet apparently decided that they knew better than his brain, because they hurried over to the couch without his dispensation. And his hand joined this revolt against his better sense by setting on her shoulder. ‘Is this supposed to help? Should I go get Mortimer? My aunts would probably know what to do about this; should I shout for them? Should I just leave, or am I helping? I haven’t been around women in ten years; how should I know how to comfort one? For that matter, why do I care? Oh, God, she’s crying; why is she crying? I don’t like it; it makes me feel all tight inside! Make it stop!’

She didn’t look up, but the tension in her neck and shoulders eased a bit, and her weeping quieted a bit. He opened his mouth to ask what was wrong when she beat him to it.

The story that surged from her mouth was heartbreakingly sad, and her sorrow bled into him, tightening his chest even further. Anger at his brother was something he understood and expected, but this was a whole new level of fury that he wasn’t sure he could cope with. Non-selfish wrath was a new concept for him, and it was so much deeper and purer than what he was accustomed to. It took a moment to swallow the urge to go find Mortimer and beat him senseless. ‘Only my brother would cheat on such a beautiful woman. He never did appreciate what he had, even when he was little.’

His limbs moved on their own again, and he sat on the couch next to the still-bawling woman. However, his next move was intentional and instinctual. He slid his arm around her, awkward as it felt, and let her head fall into the crook of his neck. No one had been this close to him since… well, ever. His aunts had never hugged him, Mortimer had hated him, and Teddy… well, Teddy wasn’t much of a hugger.

It actually felt… nice. Or, at least it did until she launched herself at him and landed in his lap with her arms around his neck. ‘What the hell do I do now?! What do I do with my hands?!’ Elaine’s head was pressed against his neck, and her tears were running into the collar of his shirt. It tickled a bit, and her body was flush with his from chest to thighs, which wasn’t helping. ‘Einstein, where are you when I need you?! I don’t understand this!’

After another moment of awkward silence, broken only by her gasping breaths, he tentatively slipped his arms around her, leaving them resting in the small of her back. Apparently, it wasn’t wrong, because she wiggled a little closer, and her breathing eased.

“Thanks for listening,” she murmured against his skin. He chuckled at the irony of the whole situation. ‘Here she is thanking me when a few hours ago, I tried to drag her, kicking and screaming, into the cellar. My brother is a real piece of work, to be able to drive her into my arms after all that.’

“You’re welcome, Elaine. And I’m sorry for my brother’s behavior,” he whispered into her hair. She didn’t reply, and at first he thought that he had finally, inevitably, offended her. He was about to start apologizing, but then her head slid sideways, and he realized that she was asleep. ‘All cried out. Poor girl,’ he thought with a sympathetic sigh. ‘Wait… what do I do now? I can’t… I can’t move, or I might wake her up. Damn it, I have to stay here all night. With her in my arms. Great.’

OooOooOooOooO (In the Cellar)

Einstein knocked back the rest of the liquor in his flask and heaved a massive sigh before settling down on the dirt floor of the basement a safe distance from the graves. ‘Where the hell is he?’

OooOooOooOooO (Very Early the Next Morning)

Elaine stirred slightly. Her eyes were stinging when she opened them, but there wasn’t enough light to see by. ‘Where am I? This isn’t my room. Did I stay the night with Mort?’ She started to sit up, intent on taking a look around, but she immediately found herself restrained. ‘What?’ Sleepy as she was, her mental faculties were a bit slow, but she still recognized that it was odd when she saw the arms wrapped around her waist. ‘Okay, what is going on?’

Trying not to panic, she rapidly examined her surroundings, still with no idea of how she had gotten there. ‘I’m lying on the couch in Abby and Martha’s sitting room. With another person. Mort, maybe?’ She turned as much as the tight hold on her would allow, attempting to discover who was holding her so intimately. ‘That’s not Mortimer.’

As she reached this conclusion, the memories of the night before came rushing back in a tide of emotion. ‘The sting in my eyes makes sense, now.’ It took her a few moments to sort through everything, from her anger at Mortimer to her despair. And there was a sort of gratefulness to Jonathan for his help and comfort, as well as a strange warmth, probably stemming from the fact that she was cradled in his arms and curled against his chest. ‘I haven’t slept that peacefully or felt that safe in a long time.’ Without truly meaning to, she nuzzled a little closer to his warmth. ‘After all,’ she reasoned when she noticed herself moving, ‘it’s cold in here, and I have no blanket, so it’s natural for me to want to be close to the only heat source in the room.’ Before she knew it, she was drifting back off to sleep, still not able to rationalize the feeling of security she got around him.

OooOooOooOooO (Later that Morning)

Unfortunate as it is, all good things must come to an end, and Elaine and Jonathan’s time resting together was no exception. A few hours after Elaine’s short period of consciousness, Abby and Martha came strolling down the stairs and headed for the kitchen to make breakfast. Martha was the first to notice the pair on the couch, but her eyesight wasn’t what it used to be, and at first she assumed the man to be Mortimer.

“Oh, Abby dear, aren’t they adorable? I suppose we shouldn’t wake them; Mortimer’s been working so hard lately, and he was up most of the night. Perhaps once breakfast is ready.” She smiled knowingly and headed for the kitchen, Abby right behind her.

The couple on the couch didn’t stir, still caught up in whatever lovely dreams they were having. It wasn’t until the aunts returned with a stack of steaming flapjacks that they awoke.

“Mortimer, Elaine, breakfast!” Abby called with a grin. That grin vanished when the man behind Elaine sat up, and it wasn’t Mortimer.

“Jonathan? What… what is going on here?!”

“Where’s Mortimer?”

“What have you done to him?”

“What have you done to Elaine?!”

“Elaine, darling, did he hurt you?”

“Yes, are you all right?”

“Jonathan, what are-”

Elaine grew tired of these accusations and cut her off. “Miss Abby! Miss Martha!” ‘Okay, that was a little louder than I meant it to be. Again.’ She lowered her voice. “Jonathan didn’t do anything to me or to Mortimer.” Despite her best intentions, she still spat his name like a curse, and her voice still broke when she did. She turned to Jonathan, who still hadn’t said anything, but he was staring at his aunts with a rather blank, slightly frozen expression. His hand was resting lightly on her hip, but he didn’t seem aware of it.

“Well then, what on Earth is going on?” Abby demanded rather nastily. ‘I need to tread very carefully here,’ Elaine realized belatedly.

“Well, I found out something last night that upset me greatly. Jonathan came to see what the noise was, and he comforted me. I suppose I fell asleep, and he didn’t want to risk waking me up by moving me. Besides, as I recall, there was some debate about the sleeping arrangements. In any case, he’s been here all night, so he couldn’t have done anything to Mortimer, and I assure you that he was the perfect gentleman with respect to me.” ‘Perhaps you shouldn’t be so quick to judge him,’ she thought acidly, ‘but I won’t say that. And I’ll keep it to myself that the upsetting thing I learned was that your precious nephew is  _ cheating on me _ .’

“Oh,” Martha managed. “Well, all right then. Er, thank you, Jonathan, for taking such good care of your brother’s fiancé. We’ll go get him, shall we?” The two women scurried up the stairs with a speed that belied their age.

“No, wait-” she protested, but they were already gone. ‘Well, this won’t be fun.’

OooOooOooOooO (A Few Minutes Earlier)

“Mortimer, Elaine, breakfast!” ‘Why must everyone in this house be so bloody cheerful?’ Jonathan grumbled mentally as he drowsily took stock of himself. ‘My arm is numb, my neck hurts, and my chest is warm. And there is hair tickling my nose. What is going on?’ These thoughts were enough for his eyes to snap open, only for his view to be blocked by the strawberry-blonde hair in question. He slowly towed himself upright, noting the pain in his back as he did so. ‘This is not a bed, either. Oh, right, the couch! The couch, and the crying, and… Elaine!’ He was suddenly much more aware of the warm body next to him and the curve under his fingertips. ‘Oh dear God, my aunts think I’m Mortimer! They won’t be pleased about this. And what is Elaine going to think about-’

His thoughts were interrupted as his aunts began shouting at him in tandem. As often happens with a trigger to a trauma, his mind shut down. He could still hear their nearly synchronized screeching, but he couldn’t make any of his muscles respond or think of a reply to get him out of the situation.

‘Jonathan, you’re in trouble again! How could you do this to your brother?! Bed with no supper, no breakfast or lunch tomorrow, a full clean of the house, and all of Mortimer’s trousers fixed, by dinner tomorrow or none then either!’ ‘Jonathan, go to bed and keep quiet!’ ‘Jonathan, leave Teddy alone; he doesn’t want to play with you!’ ‘Jonathan, you don’t deserve a cookie!’ ‘Jonathan, you’re not to be eating today; go to your room!’

He wanted to shake his head to clear it, but he still couldn’t bring himself to move. As more and more unpleasant memories rushed over him in a flood and he felt vomit rising up in his throat, and everything crushed down on him, Elaine spoke.

She came to his defense, which no one had ever done before. ‘Even Einstein is usually against me. She barely knows me, and I attacked her yesterday, but here she is, helping me. Is it because of the comforting? Does she feel like she owes me; what’s her motivation? I don’t understand.’ Still, it was enough to bring him back to himself, and he caught the next, less threatening statement from his aunt.

“Oh. Well, all right then. Er, thank you, Jonathan, for taking such good care of your brother’s fiancé.” ‘How hard is it for you to thank me for anything, Aunt Martha?’ “We’ll go get him, shall we?” ‘Oh, that’ll go over well.’ He turned back his savior, still unsure of her angle in helping him. ‘Well, at least she’s not crying again.’

“Um, perhaps you should go, Elaine. Change clothes; freshen up; gather yourself. I don’t imagine you want to face my scum of a brother looking like you just spent the night on the couch with me, however innocently. I don’t know why you did what you did just now, but we can discuss it later, if you like. But if you want to leave before Mortimer gets here, you should go.”

“Are you ordering me to leave?” She sounded almost hurt, and he quickly backtracked. ‘I don’t think I could handle her crying again. And I don’t like seeing that look on her face.’

“Of course not! I’m offering you the chance; I can handle Mortimer until you get back.” His attempt at a reassuring tone was probably not the best; he really didn’t understand people, especially women, but he truly was trying.

“Oh. Well, thank you, I suppose. And thank you again for last night. I’ll… I’ll see you later.” She practically ran for the door, and Jonathan found himself strangely disappointed. He didn’t have much time to ponder this odd turn of events, however, because practically as soon as the door closed, Mortimer came loping down the stairs with Abby and Martha right behind him. The theatre critic opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, the cellar door swung open, and an obviously inebriated Einstein stumbled out.

“What did I miss?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will probably eventually be more of this, but I haven't written it yet.


End file.
